I have neglected this blog for way too long.
When I first opened this new forum, it was meant to be a creative outlet. A place to collect my inspirations. The beautiful things I encounter in my daily life. But for some reason, I just couldn't get myself to update regularly. I told myself that it was no big deal, that I didn't have time, that I don't have followers/readers anyways, that there were more important things in my life. (Not to mention, I had a wedding to plan and all that fun stuff that usually accompany a wedding.)
But the truth of the matter is, I was just being lazy.
In life, there are always things that come up. There are always things that get in the way of you following your dreams. But the difference between those who succeed and those who don't is the action of sticking-it-through. The things that come up, those are just excuses. That's just "life." I knew all those things, and I tell it to H every time he says he wants to do something but then does the complete opposite to sabotage himself. But easier said than done. That's the way it goes.
This weekend was a really good one. We spent Friday night talking to some of my old high school friends. It was not catching-up persay, but it was relaxing to just chat the night away. Saturday was spent in the gym (morning) and at a bridal shower (afternoon). The bridal shower was for a not-so-close friend, but in a way, I'm glad I made myself go because it's good to force yourself to be social sometimes I think. Then I spent the whole night chatting with a old friend. True catching up. We talked about attitudes to life, people who are positive versus negative energies, and most importantly, life aspirations. I shared with her something that I've only shared with H, and because of her encouragement, I realized that I have been sabotaging myself. All this time when I thought that I don't know what I want to do with myself, I realize now that I knew all along but I was just too afraid to take any steps towards anywhere. I had always been afraid of my own ambitions, telling myself that it's too much, there's too much work, and hey, wouldn't it be easier to just stay home and be a couch potato? Yes it would, but is that who I want to be from this year to the next, to the next, to 10 years from now?
I forgot my ambitions. And it's time to restart. I've been recharging for way too long.